I just heard these 2 kids from flint and Detroit arguing over whose economy is worse... It's really sad what passes for competition in Michigan these days
blowing a .13 at 10 AM isn't nearly as cool as I thought it would be.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
i almost set my kitchen on fire last night. homecoming week is getting the best of me
Its name is Richard. And I think he formally introduced us.
I also love beards. The playoffs are like christmas for my vagina.
Super awkward when the coworker you made out with in exchange for molly last weekend keeps coming over to your cube and trying to talk to you
So now I'm lying here in bed taking notes from Teen Mom... I fucked up
That's the 3rd time I've gone home with her and she passed out on me. I poured 6 boxes of cereal on her and left
what better way to celebrate the birth of jesus christ than to get embarrassingly intoxicated and make poor decisions!?
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
There now exists video of me holding a (recently emptied) bottle of Russian Standard vodka, trying to sing the Russian national anthem.
You've reached your one pic per night limit. To increase your limit, start conversations before 9 and submit your request for an additional pic before 10.
I need like a billion tiny bottles of alcohol to put in the patron pinatas
Randomize
