i felt like the dude nobody likes from the mikes hard lemonade commercial
somehow we got the entire party to start singing "ill make a man out of you" from mulan. needless to say, that kid had the best keg stand i'd ever seen.
I had to write an apology letter to security guards in the hotel so I didnt get kicked out
Just got my first unemployment direct deposit!!!' celebrating at the beach
Me toooooo!! Margaritas
I never knew being a drain on a functioning society would feel so good
Call me when you get back form court. Hopefully its not later than noon. Just remember..win or lose we still booze.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
So she just had an emotional breakdown over a birthday card with a peacock on it. Yeah. She's pretty drunk, but we made it home safely.
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Fuck romance. Just shaved my nipples in the shower because I felt like it. That's the life I'm about.
He must've been a bear in a previous life. My nipple is bleeding. Shit's sensitive.
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
I might be drinking a 4-day old opened beer on a Wednesday. You're in no position to judge me.
It would have only made it one day at my place.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
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