He yelled GOOOOAAAALLL when he came.
so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
17 year olds will be the death of me.
you left your shoes but remembered to take your vodka. i see where your priorities are.
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
Your penis chewing exercise is not working
And the horses in Central Park have blankets. And Rafiki just told me "it is time" in the back of our cab.
He came over and watched the USA game with me, fucked me so good my toe cramped, then made my bed this morning before he left. Thank God for Army rangers
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
You were licking skittles to check if they were "halucinateizers" so no, you are not leaving the house while on antibiotics.
Randomize
