Good. I was naked most of the night. But sometimes I would wear my tux vest...But only my tux vest. It was classy
no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
my phone cant type all the emotion im having
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
I have not carelessly put myself in herpes way since I got a clean bill of health tyvm.
I just took my birth control with a water bottle I found in my purse with vodka in it in Spanish class. 10am is still too early for me.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
and that my friend is why you dont go in for an eye exam and drop 250 dollars on a pair of glasses after smoking a blunt
Hate sex is good. Drunk sex is better. Combine those two however and you get the best experience of your LIFE.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Ya I don't think I'm going anywhere, a cum towel, beer, and Vicodin was just exchanged in our white elephant present game
Bro if you don't text me back I'm gonna send you a picture of my nut sack every ten seconds for the rest of the night. I'm home alone with nothing to do. Don't push me.
I was the girl at the bar last night passing out free condoms and making sure everyone knew how to use them to keep the population down
I'm at a new rock bottom. Malibu on ice at work because it's the only thing they've got and no mixers.
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
