I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
God. I look like such a fucking stand up guy wearing polo shirts. You would totally trust me not to date rape you.
Acid is not a monday night drug
Just saw a british exchange student take a flyer for free dental care. Yes.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just had a flashback of you announcing "your nipples aren't that big for the size of your boobs, I've seen them"
I guess I tried to show you how big my closet was and we ended up eating pickles in my bathroom
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
he has decreed that i can sleep with anyone who has the same name as him. line up all the toms
I mean you guys are my friends and all but if you fuck with me I will not hesitate to set you on fire
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What's sexier than showing up smelling like fast food cigarettes with a jar of moonshine in your hand
You were so stoked after landing that flip that you dropped acid with three random guys without hesitation
He is a sex God. It lasted more than an hour, and I don't remember how many times I came. I lost count at 57.
Some girls mom just approved of me banging her on Fb.... For the whole world to see.. I'm officially a god.
I am putting clothes on to go find a brownie
In my experiences, brownies are better naked.
please don't ironically join a cult
Randomize