But I'm halfway naked in a seductive pose! I just want to get this right...
im goin to the NYE party with a tuxedo painted on my body. i know a girl who does it. wanna join?
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
We had a weird moment. Mid-sex he started talking. It went along the lines of "I. FUCKING. LOVE.....this condom..."
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! I REPEAT, MEAN GIRLS IS ON NETFLIX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL! I LITERALLY NOW HAVE TO CANCEL ALL OF MY WEEKEND PLANS.
Today is an "outside sex" kind of day.
that moment you remember partying with someone several years ago.. and don't remember if you slept with them or not.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
How did the surgery go?
My face feels like a marshmallow.
Depends how u look at it. Half-full, half-empty, or how should I shave my pubes
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
....I just did my boss
I love you. And I will hold your hand as we skip on the road to hell.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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