i just got a UPS package from a name and address i dont know, with one of my thongs in it. no recollection.
i have a feeling tonight will end in rehab
So A**** bought my story about how my hickey was a bruise from wrestling
on one hand i'm glad that i'm not in trouble...on the other hand i realized that the reason i cheat on her is because she is so stupid
stayed up to watch the sunrise..saw an albino taking shots on the quad..it's like there's a whole new world of people out there just waiting to meet us
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
He had a curved dick....must be a european thing
yep. it's official. for $40 they will let you lick the stripper pole.
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
when you wake up in a apartment hallway wearing someone else's shoes, you can pretty much assume last night was a success.
i woke up and saw you were brushing his hair naked. I can never pass out around you, man.
I feel like it went downhill once I decided we should take $100 tequila shots.. oops lol
They think its so cute and admirable that I learned French. BITCH HAVE YOU NEVER HEARD OF GOOGLE TRANSLATE? sexting foreign bitches, there's an app for that
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
He broke both of his legs jumping out of a window to escape a coyote.
I want to shoot him sideways (so he can still breathe) in the Adam's apple with my little crossbow.
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