so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
we fucked to don't stop believing. most epic sex EVER.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
theyre doing DJ Khaled impressions again...
He's the equivalent of a body pillow and a dildo. But still funny. We have good pillow talk.
It's sad that my net worth at the moment is 4 beers
She posted on her FB that he moved out...It's like she wants me to fuck him.
I'm so prepared to puke on walk of shame tomorrow that I'm putting a toothbrush and toothpaste in my purse the night before. And to think, my dad thought I wouldn't make it in college.
I'm having one of my monday morning walk of shame coffees if you care to join.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
He was dressed as a cowboy and he was dancing with my ex roommate. So I took his gun and pistol whipped him with it..then somehow we still slept together..
Sometimes I just want to kiss you without you pulling ur cock out and waving it at me
there is puke in my bra ... again
i'm not too sure if he's up to my expectations looks-wise, but in the penis department he exceeds ALL regulations.
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