She told me she was a cowboys fan... I told her it was a waste of a perfect set of tits
"Is there dairy in semen?" was in her recent google searches...so she's lactose intolerant AND a slut.
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
there was naked duck duck goose
how does that even get suggested?!
after naked leap frog.... it wasn't that big of a deal
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Truth be told I was googling "why is my left calf bigger than my right calf", porn would've been a better excuse for a virus.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
I agree though, his intact virginity is truly the tragedy of the century.
feelin groggy baby? need a coffee? vitamins? a nice good fuck on the piano?
The amount of drugs I did this weekend make me concerned about my health but at the same time fascinated to see if I could do more
Got home. All the lights were on. All the doors were unlocked. My room was covered in beads, there's puke in the sink and of course our toilet is still broke. I'd say it was a decent Mardi Gras
I may have been mad at the Supreme Court/patriarchy and tried to hate fuck myself.
Current status: so high that I'm unable to have coherent conversation with my mom, but still knew that when my dad said "shpritzy white stuff" I understood that he was trying to think of "whipped cream."
That text took me 10 minutes.
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
dude. that's the chick that BIT MY DICK. it doesn't matter how hot you think she is, trust me man.
Randomize
