Nailed a drunk college girl before the CU game Saturday, and a drunk married woman after the Broncos game Sunday.
Some perfection is debatable.
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
Just saw a drunk guy clapping and cheering for a chipmunk climbing up a tree. Classic
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
You said that my dog would "complete your puzzle" then you got naked and took it behind the bar
I let him fuck me in a batman costume. Don't talk to me about needing to read fifty shades gray.
If you don't let me come over I'm gonna call you on speaker and you have to listen to her scream and moan too
Our host-mom was rubbing her back sympathetically going "muy bien, chica" while she puked on the beach. So yeah, I think we got the best one.
I found my weird threshold when Truth or Dare became everyone get naked and snort Adderall off the kitchen counter.
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
It was like a single vaginal boat in a sea of one eyed monsters
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