my "about me" section on Facebook should read "hell-bound alcoholic who wants to fuck a 40-year-old crackhead"
Last night I got a napkin with 4 names & numbers: Katie, Ellen, Kylie...and Brandon.
Every time my boyfriend threatens to commit suicide I change my relationship status as "widowed".
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
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Also I may have a condom stuck inside me, but I won`t know til I check the couch coushions.
i feel like you're just hanging onto the edge of functioning wino.
I was tackling you out of excitement
Yeah thank goodness the stripper pole was there to break my fall.
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
He's worked out some sort of arangment where all three of them are dating each other and they've all moved into an apt. with two king beds pushed together
A true beacon of hope in these dark times
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I didn't get a chance to take any pics but the mental snapshot of her boyfriend calling her directly after we finished was a really special moment I wish I could properly share with you.
It's like sexual waterboarding. You gave me sex so good I'm comparing it to torture. Jesus.
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I hope. Last year I got lost in New Orleans and some guy named Cookie walked me home while I cried.
Molly I still can't believe u puked in that guys hands and still got laid
I'm floating on a rainbow and a purple elf is giving me advice. COME NOW!!!
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