I'm pretty sure "Like A Prayer" will forever remind me of drunk nights & pants down around the ankles
I never thought I'd hear the words "aww you pulled out" and "you're so sweet" in the same sentence.
well i just had my first "when i graduated college she was 12" morning
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Toga everclear = hospital visit... Im sure the paramedics hate me right now
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
Blasting venetian snares and drinking a beer. I love being an adult. It's like being a child but with beer for breakfast, better music, and no one yells at you.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Spotify knows me way to well. You mention swinger club and guess what it shuffles to? Danger Zone by Kenny Loggins
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
I'm telling you, this vagina is really making the rounds lately...
Ok, not to minimize the significance of that beautiful anecdote from your childhood, but here's a video of my penis.
If you shit your pants and not say anything about it right before we have sex one more time I'm dumping you.
Do plants get herpes?
who is this
Randomize