i just had a dream that i could control how black Will Smith was with a remote.i need to stop sleeping with the TV on
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
Their flight hasn't even left yet and the 'buy food to keep yourself alive' budget is gone on tequila.
just saw an anti-abortion rally outside of the courthouse...so naturally i tossed them out a coat hanger i found in my car
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
when does it stop being whiskey dick and start just being me bad in bed?
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I can hear my parents having sex. I REPEAT. I CAN HEAR MY PARENTS HAVING SEX! THIS IS NOT A DRILL!
Your mom is 55 and has MS. To be honest, I'm proud of her, and you should be too, bitch.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
I'm shaved like a Brazilian hooker right now.
I have the flu.
I don't give a shit
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Considering all of my stomach contents ended up in my center console, I'm a bit peckish.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
Randomize