you were convinced that if all her tampons were gone her period would stop, so you started eating them.
They normally just get fucked up and see who can hold their hand on the exhaust the longest. It's great
gpnpr hd vmdd nm the ggrl whm was mn my lar
I need you to use more vowels.
He brought a jar of pickles to the party. So now I've had beer, animal crackers, AND a pickle since noon.
Can you fuck me on the kitchen counter at some point? I'll lysol it after
The main two things I remember from last night is you "spanking Katey into reality" and watching her barf in terror.
I just took my birth control on the way to class with a 1/2 melted jello shot I happened to find in my purse from Friday night. I told you I was going hard this year.
also bought condoms to give away to people who look like they're about to make a bad halloween decision. I'm like a fairy.
I made $130 by ordering two pizzas and charging them $10 a slice. If they weren't so stoned they might have realized they could have just ordered another pizza for $20.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
I've made a single handle of rum last like three weeks and my mom hasn't even acknowledged it.
whatcha doing?
lying in bed pretending to be a slug
You're my best friend, so I'm kinda scared to say this, but.....I kinda feel odd when I show up with you at your family events and I have banged or blown at least 3 people in the room
Yeah totally passed out in their trash can last night.
Randomize
