i just threw up in a potted plant at home depot
I'm gonna have bed sores at the end of this hangover.
So... I'm really sorry I tried to sell you to random people in cars last night
I don't call you at 3 in the morning to start a fucking relationship.
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
just had to shower sitting down. i hope this isn't an indicator of how the rest of my week is going to go.
It involved homemade coconut rum, a waterfall, and street signs. I'll leave the rest to your capable imagination.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
RA just said I set the all time record for a student who lost houseing..30min..I was moveing out while my new roomate was moveing in. know of any off campous places to stay??
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
Ok here's the state of the situation: We're alone in a strange city with strange people with nothing but alcohol and sprite, I think we're gonna make it.
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
We are 100% horrible people, and im extremely happy we are friends
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Being on probation is a nice change of pace. It's refreshing to wake up and know what I did last night.
Randomize
