Sometimes I think my vagina thinks its a penis.
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
Pray the makeout fairy visits me this weekend.
Just found a picture of a hobo making out with her tits...a HOBO
The question is do I invite my fuck buddy to my graduation party now that my girfriend found out about her?
I think I saw maybe 3 ugly girls the entire time we were there
Yea its like that frat house was built to keep fat chicks out of parties
I drunkenly took 3 laxatives last night since I felt fat.... this is going to be a rough morning
Knows all the good gay bars AND has a dog? Wtf can't I drop pizza on guys like that????
he just fucked me for my cheese.
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
i said cake fell into my bra, you stood up and yelled "Im coming soldier", leaped acrossed the couch and started motorboating my boobs. i would have been cool with it if your mom didnt keep calling me the "lesbiainizer"
Drunk is a universal language darling
Thrres cinnamon everywgte. Plead cine get me
I had a date last night. His dog threw up in his bed while we were having sex in it.
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