i blacked out hard core.. it was bad peeeed muh bed
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
He literally didn't stop until I lost count of how many times he made me orgasm. It took three hours.
As much as I'm all for laying on his living room couch, watching spongebob and having spoon sex, it's becoming a routine.
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
we aren't going to have kids. there's a 50% chance that they would look like him. not worth the risk
The US State Dept doesn't need to know I'm a high strung drunken whore.
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
What does that mean when you have a child masturbating in your dream? Is that weird?
In my drunk state I was like I ONLY HAD SEX WITH SOMEONE ELSE BECAUSE HE WAS THE HOTTEST GUY IVE EVER EVEN SEEN
Hey, scratch that. I've shit 8 times today. I don't have the energy to get laid so I cancelled my date.
i knew my hormones were back to normal when i went to ikea and didn't want to fuck any of the workers
Randomize
