I think tonya harding is in my dwi class!
Ask her how she and Jeff Gillooly split the cats after the divorce.
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
and she said "My body is an orphanage, I take everybody in"...
Eating nacho cheese off the carpet. How is your morning?
TONIGHT IS GOING TO BE A FUCKING BLAST. EVEN IF I HAVE TO SET OFF A BUNCH OF FIREWORKS IN YOUR KITCHEN.
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Let's just says his mouth writes a lot of checks that his penis just can't cash. Don't waste your time.
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
Throwing up into Nora's potty chair while simultaneously having beer shits was truly the highlight of my Christmas season.
Why does your place smell like gin and misery?
I prefer to think of it as 'ode to single life'
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
She told me the next morning I stared at her tits for like 15 minutes with binoculars from only a few seats away.
Upstairs definitely just had sex while I wrote you love poetry. That was a fun experience 🤷🏻♀️
I have a number of responses, ranging in content, tone, and maturity. Choose your destiny...
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