Yeah and Nick is shooting his loaded 9mm in his backyard.
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
I caught a rooster roaming Edison Park then released it in the bar. They made me try to catch it again and somebody played the chicken dance while I chased it
I'm quite proud of this turning point from one night stands to giving some guy a BJ to fix my car for free.
wanna go with us to feed the ducks bread soaked in vodka?
how could i say no?
I'm now at that point where it just feels natural to do a few shots of whisky with breakfast and then head to work
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Whatever dude, I don't feel bad about it. If my girlfriend finds out even SHE should give me a high five. That bitch was fine
Apparently I was the fucked up drunk guy greeting people at the hotel in the lobby last night.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
He literally cocked blocked all the dudes that tried to talk to the girls he was with, and they all loved him.
Same guy who tossed the brunet over his shoulder as they left screaming "Bring me my lucky shovel!"
I feel like a pizza delivery girl of vagina tho
my cockatiel has aquired a taste for beer. I should not be allowed to own exotic pets.
I'm worried about your health. And your boobs. Actually, health, then boobs. Health first, boobs second. And third.
Randomize
