This morning when you woke up you looked like one of the Wii Bowling people. I think it was the eyebrows combined with the sambuca
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
We need to either start getting drunk more often or one of us need to start doin drugs
Wtf? Why?
I want awesome conversations to show the world.
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
the bartender cut u off when u asked him for his screename so u could IM him later
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
Next time I see you, remind me to tell you how I fell through my attic door and landed on my feet in the garage on the first floor.
I opened up my wallet and it was filled with puke.
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I was so exhausted I thought about using my deep throat spray to stop my coughing.
We lost a condom inside me, I had to fish it out. The next day he gave me a Gone Fishin' bumper sticker. True love at its finest.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
YO I WASNT TRYING TO MAKE A PASS AT YOU.... Or Jesus
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Randomize
