he said i was weird because i want to have sex in public places.
i dont think thats weird i think thats fun
i forgot to tell you, he fell asleep outside my house again last night, but im weird
she came over and started getting naked and said its not like i came over to just hang out
youve hit the jackpot
I didn't black out, the guy in the Men In Black costume erased my memory
We've reached that awkward stage of the relationship where he's in love with me when he's drunk, but sober him is still afraid of commitment.
So i told him he was the 3rd i have ever slept with and then i found out he had actually slept with 5 other girls besides me. And his reply was well your number one on this hand.
So many stories. To uyou are sober. I heart you though. Jesus. Dirrty dancing jusyt came oine!!no. Lie.
I'm honestly too sad to drink and hang out with strippers. This breakup sucks.
ive been a drunken mess for the last 5 days. i feel like a 19 year old again
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
i looked down and was like "oh shit thats blood" then it was like "shit, thats not my blood." then it was like whos blood is this??
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
I'm sure if Robin Williams was still with us he would want you to see boobs.
I don't know what that means but it's making me want to fuck you.
Randomize
