At least we don't have one night stands
True that. We sink our claws in our men.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
oh but the power of the cock will take you to places you never been..i flew to hawaii once to sleep witha chick
who paints a picture of their own dick and sends it to people. i dont know if its borderline crazy or just fucking genius...
we were bear claw grabbing his crotch in the middle of the bar yelling prominent ridge over and over.
you're like that jamaican tarat card reading chick... only with herpes
Just blew my age on the breathalyzer. I also have 8 stitches in my head. So worth a .22 though. All time record.
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I took a sleeping pill while he was in the bathroom. Time for a game of how long can we bang before I fall asleep.
You are both horrible and amazing
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
I've also stopped shaving, like, everything. I can't tell if I'm empowered or sad
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
Randomize
