I'm the only one here who isn't hooking up, coming out of the closet, or crying because of one of those 2 things.
Just fucked my roommate on the first night of our 12 month lease. 2010 will be awkward.
suddenly, hermaphrodite night sounds like a really bad idea
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
There's a warrant out for his arrest for throwing a mannequin through a bus stop.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
He just told an 8 year old to go fuck himself so we probably won't be in the butterfly exhibit much longer.
I must have some kind of deep rooted instinct that tells me when a boys virginity needs to be taken.
It's a little weird that I'm blowing my wingman.
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
Well, I told him that it's not all about him. Then I gave him the best blow-job in the history of blow-jobs.
If me saying "come f***k me now" is talking, then yes.
Based on the conversation I'm going to assume you didn't close the deal.
It started going awry when I fell through a roof.
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
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