btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
It's going to be great. They guy at the store said 3 shots and you won't be able to feel your face or stop smiling.
Its become more of a routine.. Whenever I get done eating and have left overs I just take it over to his house and throw it all over the walls and windows. Pay backs a bitch ehhhh
he's my ex-boyfriend's best friend... he tried to make out with me to prevent me from hitting his friend. then they almost fought about it.
teach me your ways.
I figured out that he lasts longer when I rap during sex. He made it all the way through "Love the Way you Lie"
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
Just purchased ketchup, body wash, and lube. Hope you're ready for the post-memorial-day-cookout-shower-anal.
Sexting across continents is really a perfect example of how far technology has come.
Consider yourself lucky. If I ever run into my ex, all I'll be able to think is, "I let you pee on me and lead me around on a leash."
Apparently I offered the cop my Taco Bell.
Desperate times...
i opened the door and you were passed out on my doorstep wearing ugly shorts and cuddling a pinnapple, i dont know what happened to you.
Listen, I just paid for a hotel room, so I didn't have to have sex in his car. I'm adulting successfully.
She asked me to tell her the three words every girl wants to hear so I whispered "I play hockey" in her ear.
They say you need two forms of ID, but in reality 1 nice set of tits works every time
Randomize
