How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
this is not the time for floating mt dew and shots of tequila.
Hung over. Bed full of legos for some reason. Not getting up. Come build stuff with me.
She bellyflopped onto the poolside bar, broke one wine bottle, and stole another...the resort staff just frowned and cleaned up her mess.
Actually, considering the facts that I am wearing a duct tape dress and eating a gas station quesadilla, I am pretty good.
i broight you flpweers amd vodka. open yoir bask door
The bosnian sent me a sext with his dick next to a comcast remote. It went up to the "stop" button. Ironic and appropriate. Grab your remote and imagine it.
You've ruined television for me.
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
You know it's going to be a good night when you're barking by 8:20.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
This girl braided my pubes while i was asleep. Now i cant get them undone.
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
He ate me out in the passenger seat of his Range Rover in a Tim Hortons parking lot. I could hear “oh canada” on the radio from a nearby school as I came. Most patriotic orgasm ever!
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