recess is on disney at 4 in the morning, insomnia has never been so rewarding
Reggie can tackle my bush.
I seriously think I have a tan line on my stomach from getting a boner while in the taning bed.
Apparently everytime he put me down to bed I escaped out the window, I faintly recall climbing into the canoe in the back yard, and air paddling.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Its all fun and games until someone grabs the electrical fence.
You need to come over. I cant get her to stop eating honey mustard straight from the squeeze bottle
She carries a brick in her purse. I wouldn't get in a fight with her
In other news, shitting yourself is not an acceptable way to start a Thursday.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's a man in a pumpkin/reaper outfit advertising a new head shop outside the Taco Bell. I love this town.
it would be a downgrade if your vagina tasted like skittles
Whatever you didn't send me pics of you topless making bacon
I just threw up vodka and hot dogs in a handicapped stall with someone in it who couldn't make me leave because he couldn't walk.
How is it??
I'm drinking Gatorade out of a champagne flute.
She doesn't even give a fuck about angle. I seriously gotta start doing like penis yoga or something.
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