Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I don't know how God could bestow someone that emotionally confused with such an awesome penis.
you wore rainboots all night because you said the forecast called for wine spillage
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
Only you could be admitted to the ER and walk out with a nurse's phone number. I wish I was gay
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I vaguely remember having a cowboy explain his belt buckle to me in the bathroom hallway
She was rubbing her face on the carpet, she was high.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I was so high I didn't realize I'd put on someone else's bra. I thought my boobs had shrunk.
Also this time, I didn't have a random creepy guy come up from behind me, grab my junk, and whisper "where's the cocaine?" in my ear. So that's also a win.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
I gave my girlfriend a ring to celebrate our anniversary, she thought It was an engagement ring. Now im getting married and I don't know what to do.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
Randomize