listening to techno makes your hand move faster while masterbating
We played Russian Roulette with a revolving Nerf gun. If you shot yourself in the face, you had to drink.
He started making shapes and faces with his cock and balls.... apparently if you wrap the shaft with your balls and turn it 90 degrees to the left it looks like a hamburger
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I don't know what you drank last night but you really enjoyed the 4 egg body shots.
I have a king size bed, I guarantee multiple orgasms, and I'll give you a ride home in the morning. Respond quickly.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
Get here, there are important joints to be smoked and pies to be eaten
She shoved a hot dog in my pocket and started grinding on it.
We did it to 80's cardio music. Talk about a workout.
Nothing quite like the "I had sex you a month ago and now we're stopped at the same 4 way" wave
Almost lost a vagina lip in the great shave of '16
QUICK FAX ME THE BALL
Not how faxing works at all btw
The dog peed on the neighbors baby Jesus. No wonder she thinks we're the devil.
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