I told her at least we still had each other. That's when she started crying.
Your sister got a Brazilian yesterday. It looks great
You were in the corner dancing by yourself yelling "I look good", when really you looked ridiculous and drunk
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Also, do you think you think his dick is perfect bc you loved him? Or is it actually perfect?
shes on the ground doing bicycle kicks screaming "is my ass good enough for you now satan" send help
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
He took me home and by the time I woke up after catching up on sleep I realized I accidentally put on one of his fiances socks. whoops.
I'm about to eat a 2month old weed brownie I just found in my lax duffel bag. will you answer if I call you in like an hour and a half
PEOPLE ARE STILL EATING FAJITAS IN DROVES. BY THE CASELOAD. THERES A FORKLIFT OF SIZZLING MEATS.
About to wash down a xan with an iced pumpkin spiced latte from starbs and I feel like I've never lived up to my stereotype so much at one time
I think sunday funday got a little out of control. There is cheese slices and BBQ sauce all over the roof and 4 empty bottles of vodka in my room.
Randomize
