just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
The best part of listening to lady gaga while high is that any word your brain puts in is right.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
The money is just too good to quit doing it. I'm using the same justification strippers use.
Spring Fling is on 420. The theme better be 'Flower Child'.
I want there to be fog machines and unicorns.
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
Where are you? Your parents are here. Their flight got in early.
Trashy Tequila Tuesdays. Have them meet me here @ the bar.
I'm not sending your parents to see you drunk at a gay bar. What kind of boyfriend do you think I am?
A great one. Entertain them i'll be home soon....... I think
Everyone here knows me as 'that chick who will most likely steal your girlfriend'. My 99% success rate tells me this name is acceptable.
You should never be more than a quarter of a mile from a working toilet
Preach!
where did we go last night? there's dollar bills all over my room & they're all wet.
I put the area codes from ludacris' "area codes" into our expensive data visualization software at work, it's been a productive day
all I remember is grinding on everyone in the room regardless of gender and quoting the lion king non-stop. We need to stop buying Jameson.
I enjoy the company of your penis
I'm intrigued by how his mouth tasted the same as his dick.
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