My brain says no but my pants say off.
at church Sunday morning I dropped an M&M down my dress and it landed in my bra. I fished it out and ate it. A lot of people saw me.
So on facebook, the pictures from my church mission trip are right up next to the pictures of my first time on E. Sorry Jesus.
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
I pretty much have hash tequila and gelato for dinner every night
Sexual tension squid is drowning in the sexual tension
Is eating fries while lying on the floor bad for you?
If I choke and die at least I will have been doing something I love
Was it fun? The night started with home made Jager and ended in him falling out of a tree with a pocket full of house numbers...you tell me.
I changed my birth control schedule so that I'm on my period while you're gone this week
I don't deserve you.
He will be so fat that the winter can not penetrate his blubber.
Do you remember telling the Uber driver that "his cologne makes you want to bone"?
Vodka for breakfast. With a side of Frankenberries. Don't judge me.
How far are you from my house? Do I have time to masturbate before you get here?
it looks like a nuclear can of fuck blew up in here
Randomize
