If it were my dying wish, would you come over 2nite 2 save me?:):):) wana come anyways?
This is how scared I get when I ride roller coasters. And how scared I was when I had to poop when I had herpes.
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
soo apparently i was out of money so i stayed in the bathroom for an hour-ish passing out paper towels for money..needless to say i got kicked out
You went to church with your boobs hanging out?
Theyr'e a gift from god, I figured I should show him i'm using them well.
Don't look him in the eyes, it like looking at the sun but instead of burning your retinas it makes you wet and vulnerable
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
so gross sitting on a warm chair at a restaurant..you just know a fat person was sitting there shoveling food into their face for hours.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
Turns out the creepy dude who bought us tequila shots was the friend of a friend who then got us a table and several large bottles of champagne.
Never judge a man by his mustache.
As I was balls deep, she moaned "i can't wait to see what how hot our daughter will be". Instant de-boner
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
I'm writing off my condom expenses in my taxes
Also. I think I just got sentimental over a nude
We're so high we're eating flavored lube.
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