eating mexican with the mother in law. this meal made her decide to tell us about her colon cleansing diet
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
hot doctor. gonna get him to touch my tits. 'think i felt a lump' excuse in 3-2-1...
We got kicked out after you decided to chase your shot using the soda gun behind the bar.
She peed in the limo. She stood up and pulled up her dress and peed on the floor of the limo.
Girl, that was the lost night of 2012 for me and I have buried that night deep deep away..
You're the horniest male I have ever encountered
Makes it sound like you're a scientist documenting your discoveries. I warned you.
I AM AT THE LOUNGE WHERE THEY FILMED THE LAP DANCE IN SHOWGIRLS....IT IS AMAZING
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
I mean, except for the part where I was vomiting up pineapple and hot sauce, it was a really fun time.
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
I was so hungover at work I had my shirt on backwards. I had no idea how I managed to get through today puke free.
all i'm saying is don't blame me if your purses are filled with whoppers
are we talking malt balls or BK?
I'm seriously considering starting a savings account so I'll have bail money this summer.
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