Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
Puked in a plastic neiman Marcus bag while driving. My biggest accomplishment yet
It's my birthday, I plan on masturbating and boating, maybe even masturbate on the boat.
even the AIR tastes like tequila.
A beer fell out of the case, hit the ground and started spraying. He's a pro. He grabbed it and shotgunned it while still holding the case.
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
HOW LONG TILL THESE DRUGS WEAR OFF. I WORK IN ONE HOUR, I REPEAT, I WORK IN ONE HOUR.
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
I fucked my cousin and caught chlamydia this year. I can't really harbour any illusions about myself anymore.
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
Yet he continued to eat cereal out of the glove compartment in my car.
Who knew that the guy I fucked on your front lawn during welcome week freshman year would turn out to be my husband
Is it inappropriate to match with someone on tinder just to ask if the friend in his profile picture is single?
i was in class looking for a pencil and found a chicken strip in my back pack. i think i might have a problem.. sad thing is i ate it
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