Some girl in the stall next to me just yelled "fuck yes i started my period!" she came out of the stall and we high fived. who am i to judge? i do that every month.
I'm going to appeal my grade. Is it better to look studious or slutty?
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
Package from mother. Contents: Cookies, my old pokemon cards, and condoms. Note: "These have a July 2010 expiration date so give them away or use them with a gal that would be a great daughter in law. Love Mom" Love you too momma
You kept asking who was the good cop and who was the bad cop, you said you only wanted to talk to the good one
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
Just found a partially digested mushroom under my bed. Thanks for that.
I have bruises on the inside of my thighs from sliding down the stair case...thanks for encouraging that slut show
Dude he's not responding... I'll take that as an unpleasant visit to the clinic
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
The only flat surface we had was a cheez it box so we snorted the blow off of that. Rock bottom really isn't that bad.
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Randomize
