went in for an STD check and they referred me to an alcohol and drug councilor. kick me when i'm down.
You wouldn't stop asking the hibachi cook if his knife was a hattori hanzo
I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
i want to major in coloring with an emphasis on crayons.
so finals studying is going well?
I'm drinking rum and coke straight from the 2 liter bottle.
I got cut off for calling the flower girl a slut. What are you doing?
but then i turned into a human whiteboard because i thought it was a good idea to bring out markers
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
With a few pieces of metal and duct tape and a bong was created
Go forth my little lesbian, get your gayme on
Got 3360 Shoppers points for buying Plan B. I guess this all worked out for the best.
Also this morning I remembered seeing the stripper he threw up on later in the night. She was clothed though.
Randomize
