I wish they made portable blow up dolls for girls.
It's called a dildo, genius. Go to sleep.
Remember in school when they told us our vag was made just the right size for our future husband? I must say I am enjoying trying to find that perfect fit.
Using your Catholic School education as an excuse for this? Why didn't I think of that?!
I figured, if I'm going to wear a gold cape its pretty safe to assume I'll be blacking out as well.
Odd question. Did you find a 20 in your boxers? I need it for gas.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want the one making out with the dumpster. Is that bad?
Honestly the war on drugs is dumb and you can just sleep in my bed which is mega comfortable anytime you want. There I said it
You know your high, when your chugging applesauce out of the jar with no utensils.
So I am watching ghostbusters and I realized Rick moranis is basically in the friends zone than he turns into the key master bangs her and it leads to the end of the world...maybe there is a reason people are in the friend zone
You kept purposefully giving me wrong directions, laughing, then yelling at me for taking directions from a drunk person.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Girl you're stalking so hard you're gonna know both their social security numbers soon
Officially spring today. First sighting of loud-ass Steller Jay on the balcony.
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
can we do this tomorrow? ...i accidently got high.
I'm not having sex with him if he doesn't believe in gay marriage and abortions.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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