hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
i'm lost and i look like a hooker
I cannot stress to you how much better your current situation is than listening to gay sex
Yep. About to get on pornhub to spill some Christmas cheer
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
I really thought you were going to tell me you were pregnant on facebook chat. FACEBOOK CHAT. I almost cried.
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
He wrote me poetry. 12 hours after getting my number
You'd be proud! I didn't lose my id this time... It got confiscated
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
you went to ralph's and bought all of their pears and left them outside my house
my boobs just made me lose a game of beer pong. the balls hit them, bounced off and into the cup. twice. ive never been so disappointed in them.
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I opened the bathroom door and the starting point gaurd was eating out my art history professor
Come on in and take your pants off
Randomize
