Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Quoting wale wont save you from herpes
so let's talk penis.
if i hear one more christmas song, i will fucking shoot myself.
so when we were booking the hotel and plane tickets for vegas we reserved a chapel for someone, it's inevitable.
some dude is stoned out of his mind in my calc class. just shouted that the teacher was a genius cause he got rid of so many numbers
Two word: claymation porn. Think about it.
I don't think I can ever express my appreciation for the things you text me.
Ill tap morse code on the ceiling when im ready for you to come down amd smoke
I'm getting kicked out of the place we're at. They don't like ketchup on their walls..
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
It's a mix of hot dirty sex and week old bong water
Putting plan B on my parents credit card wasn't the smartest idea
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