Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
I finally had sex with him last night, but we used a condom so it doesn't add to my number of sexual partners.
Okay I've seen like three girls walking around crying today. Weird?
everyone's regretting their thursdays.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
you made your own hammock out of a towel and duct tape.
we are playing family charades. my sister pointed at me. everyone guessed alcoholic.
He called my vagina a rainforest. This is coming from a guy whose pubes are longer than his dick.
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
Yea we slept in ur room but im 80% sure we didnt have any peanut butter in there
There is a mobile STD testing unit set up at my place of employment. In the lunchroom. I may need to reevaluate my career choices. And my lunch plans.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
He's tiny, but ripped. Like a stacked hobbit. He's going to pull our sexy, crime-fighting rickshaw.
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Randomize
