when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
her dad is making me watch Glen Beck, i only agreed because i penetrated his daughter earlier.
It's 8 am and he's already trying to get me to make out with a girl.
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
I woke up to her vacumming the grass
can't make this up: he's writing lyrics for the musical reenactment of how he met her @ an anime convention to perform at their wedding. yes, there'll also be dance routines involved.
i can barely draw a stick figure let alone shave a heart into my pubes
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
Come to find out, there is a place where binge drinking and aggressive head butting is completely appropriate. In a mosh pit, Travis is just a regular dude!
Two things. 1) party at my house this Friday 2) what was the name of the Australian you fucked on the cruise ship?
Hey I know we haven't talked in a while, but I wanted to thank you for those m&ms you bought me for Christmas. Sorry I never got you anything then broke up with you.
He had a temporary tattoo of Justin Bieber on his dick and I still had sex with him
Randomize
