Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
It'd be like medium rare by now.
I love how we're talking about your vagina like it's a piece of meat.
It reminded me of the time my mother gave my Bailey's in my stocking when I was 14.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You put your shot glass in your waistband and then told me how convinent it was.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
Woke up naked on a bed full of money, doughnuts, and keys that weren't mine. Unsent dick pick on phone, and cheap cigar butt on my pillow. Also...I maybe hotwired my car.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
please come back they are interrogating me about masturbation
We just banged and he's microwaving shrimp noodles and I'm eating tostitos alone in the dark this is why our relationship works
I just sustained a forearm injury dancing to salt n peppa in my kitchen. Fack. I pushed it real good.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
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