this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
i do some of my deepest thinking on my wednesday morning walks of shame
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
You're not on my level until you shop at Petsmart for sex accessories.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Lets play a game called: how out of it are you today? Let me know if you can beat driving on the wrong side of the road twice and walking up two extra flights of stairs just because you weren't paying attention to what floor you are on....
Where were you last night, and why am I not surprised that drag queens were involved?
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
I woke up with a twisted ankle and was covered in lube. Not entirely sure what happened last night
Also, feel like I need to install a nanny cam to remind myself what I did the night before.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
Everytime after he came, he'd laugh uncontrolably for ten mintutes. He was sober..
Just shaved my balls on a moving train. By far the most dangerous stunt I've ever pulled
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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