Miss Michigan hasn't even been Miss USA for 24hrs and already stripper pole pics are surfacing. Classy.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
I think he liked me better when I only opened my mouth to suck his dick.
So apparently after he gets hammered, falls down a set of stairs and gets a concussion, he can still come home and find a way to play his guitar solo bullshit as loud as possible while i seduce my date...
No i peed with you in the toilet. The guy I high fived was mid pee in front of the urinal
I wasn't sure how he was going to followup "so,i shot myself.." i guess "w a nail gun" is the best choice out of what I expected
this is worse than the time i threw up a condom.
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Dude. All those hangovers I never had came back with a vengeance. I just opened the door of this car to barf. The car was not motionless. We are on the autobahn.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Yeah. I'm so over work, that I'm not even satisfied pretending to work anymore. I just flat out want to go home. Fuck this job
I am going to go back to drinking and listneing to Hanson now. Maybe crying. Or perhaps Full House reruns
Sigh. I haven't seen a dick since August 22nd. And in case you forgot, it's January.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
The Game of Thrones convention was just a drunk fuckfest.
Please tell me you banged Jon Snow.
Randomize
