I woke up naked on the bathroom floor. the tile grout marks on my boobs hurt, i mananged to use a roll toilet paper as a pillow. never again. did we eat salad?
In the library. Still drunk. Shoes missnig. Term paper due in fiften minutes. Iff I puke u think theyll throw me out?
My parents just out drank me... I cant get back to college soon enough
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
Found out last night that "Everclear" is Spanish for "shit got weird"...
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
I may or may not be sitting in a bubble bath drinking wine, watching Jurassic park, and wearing a Russian fur hat.
I'm getting 800 nuggets from McDonald's
chicken nuggets make me a bit homicidal
I'm going to be such a slut in Europe I've already decided
Send me dick pics. We'll make a scrap book
I may have dislocated my hip getting fucked on the bathroom counter
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
I need weed and if he's hot, maybe he can supply me with sex too.
Woke up way too warm in the middle of a spooning sandwich. Was working up a rant about still not wanting a threesome. Then I realized the littlest spoon was the dog. Might need to break up anyway.
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