Do you remember getting into a Delorean last night?
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
ok, his religious views on facebook are madonna lyrics. we no longer have to wonder about his sexuality.
He made sure to throw up on the Mexico side of the border while we were in line at the check point. Then finished by screaming you an have it back. You can have it all back.
I don't know why I've never thought to take my bong into the bathtub before.
and she was grinding on the wall, purring at guys she liked at the pregame...
I was fucking the girl and her best friend walked in on us. She said we looked thirsty, got us a glass of water, and poured it down both of our throats. It was like... sex bottle service
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
I'm treating this like a real date. My boobs aren't even out.
I'm so proud, I have tears
The last thing I remember is singing hotel California with a hobo and asking every bald man I saw if I could touch his head.
There are grandparents doing keg stands I don't know
Are we gonna talk about that cunnilingus snap
who knew rolling through the dorm on a scooter in footie pajamas would attract so many guys. he said i'm his soulmate.
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
