glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I had fun this weekend too. According to Web MD, my symptoms say I had a miscarriage.
so not only am i rooming with two chicks on the volleyball team, but we just put down the deposit on a hot tub. this is going to be the best summer ever for my dick.
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
Remember that time we became friends because I shotgunned a Tall Boy in your bathroom?
Those memories are both hazy and awesome.
Went to the strip club with my aunt. Do you know how hard it is to be a pervert in front of your female family members?
If he's the sort of guy that will fuck in a public restroom, he's the sort of guy that will cheat on his gf. I'm goin for it.
Had a crazy moment last night. Had to get up, run to bathroom, pop 3 Xanax, sit on bathroom floor and rock myself in fetal position. Not my best moment.
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
When I woke up today i said I will NOT sleep with her. This morning I did the walk of shame into work wearing the same clothes... How was your Monday?
Also: that bruise on my leg where you left like 3 sets of teeth marks keeps getting run into the corners of desks and shit. And I can't even complain to anyone at work
how does that bad decision feel?
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
She sent a group text pic called "Assemble" of his dick next to her forearm.
I'm down.
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