Welp...herpes.
found your viking helmet in the parking lot this morning, its missing a horn. There was still liquor in the remaining horn. shots from a viking helmet should be mandatory.
I slept face down in the dirt because I wanted to go camping?
I gave ten strangers a full description of his penis and its abilities. I need to stop drinking.
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
Nypd just made jon and hayes chug their forties.
What are you talking about?! I shot gunned a monster while simaltaneously blowing gym boy Todd. If I'm not the poster child for being well rounded and versatile I have no idea what NYU is looking for
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
We had an in depth conversion about the best way to take a dick pic. Both with and without mirrors.
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
I'm like a sensual ninja. You turn your head for a second and.... BOOM I'm naked. It's like a naughty magic trick.
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
Randomize
