I'm high, and her 2,100 tagged pictures annoy me even MORE. I wish it had a google searchbar so I could type in "cleavage pics" to get to the point.
I just asked the dr if it was herpes while wearing my shirt from the strip club...
I told you to stay away from the strippers in Oklahoma
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Ok roommate is officially weird. Just watched her microwave the same broccoli 3 times in a row and cry b/c she fucked it up. Wtf lol
And I might get them triple pierced after that
Damn, I didn't realize you'd declared war on airport metal detectors
I don't know where he learned to eat pussy but I thought I was going blind
This is going to be the time I got green body paint on Chris' ceiling all over again...
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
My penis is saying yes, several less important organs are saying noo...
I sent him a tit pic on accident and he replied with "nice ass"
My uterus feels like it went 8 rounds with Mike Tyson. And that was only a quickie.
I just tried to get a motorcycle cop to give me a ride....he told me not to ask strangers for rides
oh so have I but I'd still suck a dick or 20 in the name of freedom.
your marriage is hazardous to my nightlife
yea, mine too.
we should paint friendship bongs
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