I don't understand why we need a holiday to become more aware of boobs...
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
DID YOU JUST COME OUT THROUGH A FACEBOOK COMMENT??
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I think she's going to be dangerous to drink with, but I'm ready for the adventure.
We are keeping it ultra classy drinking 40s and playing croquet with 90s rap blasting in the back ground
I gather from Facebook you got drunk last night and took semi naked pictures of yourself?
He was chasing Ciroc shots with sips of Captain Morgan... he didn't make it to midnight
I'm doing an Uber ride of shame in a red, white and blue bikini top and America shorts. Good for me.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
why did i wake up in the bathroom?
we had to stay with you a while until we convinced you it wasn't safe to wash your face, then you fell asleep with your foot in the toilet.
Fuck. Totally just had sex instead of studying for econ test in an hour. Gonna get fucked again. HELP ME WITH YOUR EXTENSIVE KNOWLEDGE OF ECON
Randomize
