porn star on stage now. Get unkicked out.
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
I found this letter on my leg this morning "dear sober self- we are one body now. It's weird but get used to it because it already happened" who the fuck is lionman?
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
Try not to get arrested for it, but otherwise i support you
He's CUTE. and foreign
I've never felt more disgusting in my life. And I'm including the time I snuggled that homeless woman in the puddle of my whiskey vomit.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Why am I sticky / covered in baby Tylonel?
Yeah I mean I think I need to stop living off of snacks and alcohol
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
I just timed my pee with a stop watch. From when the main stream started to ended. It was 45.1 seconds. This is the truth trust me.
It's National Whipped Cream Day, prep those nips
Randomize
