And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
its a saturday night. im home alone watching legally blonde, eating week old birthday cake and drinking milk out of the carton. so yeah im doing real well
I just realized this is gonna be the last time that I'm high in my childhood home. I'm kinda sad. I'm really high..
Just watched porn on a 60 inch plasma screen TV... So that's where the clitoris is
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
So befoe we go on this mission how reliable are you for bailing peope out of jail
4 girls from the bar, me, strip basketball. here. NOW
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
I'm considering offering a class on how to find good porn.
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
The fact that it neither of us came up with the reason of "it's morally and ethically wrong" speaks volumes about this relationship
First of all she starred talking about God which immediately killed my buzz
Beer and Reeses. dinner of champions
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
Give me like 5, I have to feed a moose and find my pants.
Randomize
